Babycakes

Went to the hospital this morning after hours and hours of regular, intense contractions. They stopped when we got there, leaving me very upset. My midwife came and checked me - 1 cm, swept my waters and sent us walking for an hour. No change in contractions, now 1.5cm. She strongly recommended that we stay and induce, but I wasn't having that. I want to do this on my own.

I've been up for three days straight, not sleeping, having horrible night contractions. Tonight I have reached my limit. I cannot do this anymore. Every contraction rips right through me, and I'm panicking. If we were at the hospital right now I'd be begging for an epidural and wouldn't fight pitocin.

I can't make it through this anymore. Three days straight of contractions, but two whole days of really no break....I just can't get through this.

Pray that we make it through, that Savannah comes quickly and without any problems, that we don't have to have another cesarean, that I can do this. I know I can...but I'm so sleep deprived and laying down just produces contractions that are not manageable, and I'm ready to pass out and throw up from exhaustion and pain. And all I can do is sit here and let Jared get sleep and try to make it on my own.

Please please please let this all be over soon.