Monday, August 20, 2007
Lots going on. PPD is back...seeking help. For right now, Jared and I share our common mantra: "just keep swimming". Sounds dumb, maybe, but Dory from Finding Nemo (Emma's favorite movie) has really made things easier to get through. In fact, when I'm done breastfeeding (hopefully not for another 2 years) I'll be getting a tatto of those words. Also, one of each girls footprints.

Jared works 4 days a week, 11 hours a day. This leaves me saying "just keep swimming" over and over to myself during the hard times when PPD leaves me thinking I'm unable to cope. I. hate. this.

But we're getting by. I'm doing okay. Emma and Savannah are both joys and wonderful babes and make the darkness less blinding. It's not as bad as last time, only a few times of utter terror and helplessness. All in all, I'm doing really okay.

Also, going for certification from DONA, doulas of north america. Yep, gonna be a certified doula. Very exciting for me, a calling for sure. Also going for my masters in literacy in the spring, so very busy.

Okay, that's about all. Oh, random pics of the girls:

Emma's kissy face: (21 months old!)

Savannah at 7 weeks - yes, she takes a binky because if she didn't she'd be sucking on me 24/7. And at this point, that would drive me crazy. Not as in "drive me crazy" the stupid cliche, but "my PPD is coming back so bad at times that if I wasn't able to put the baby down and let her suck on a binky while dealing with Emma's toddler tantrums I'd honestly, literally be sucked down into the winding spiral of hell that I went through last time I gave birth".

Emma carrying her doll, Noodle, and Curious George. This is because we wear Savannah so often! I need to make this little girl a doll sling to match mine.

Savannah has the same long eyelashes of Emma and her Daddy, and they're getting dark, too!

Notice the little elvish ear? Just like me. :) I'm so in love.

Posted by Kier at 11:17 AM |


At 12:28 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said........
I'm sorry to hear about the PPD. I hope you are able to get some help. And the "just keep swimming" has been a mantra of mine too, something birthingway and I reminded each other of as we went through our surprise pregnancies and then Abby's death.

I love the idea of the tattoos!

And the pictures? Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful!!!


At 12:12 AM, Blogger Sara said........
So glad you posted! I was wondering how you were doing and how your girls were. (beautiful as ever, obviously!) As you and I talked about before, I went through PPD some with Ainsley, although I am still not sure what triggered it or if was a combination of factors. (still thinking lack of sleep was a big part) I know they say it is common to have it with a second child if you had it with the first, so I assume it may be a challenge for me again, too. I know it doesn't really help, but just know I am here if you need to chat.

PS - Ainsley's toddlerisms are so hard to handle at times, I catch myself thinking, "And I thought it was hard when she was a newborn?!?!" haha

At 10:00 PM, Blogger Kier said........
I had no clue you used "just keep swimming" as well! It's funny how one little blue, insanely forgetful fish could possibly say something so wise. :P
I haven't commented lately but I'm reading your lj every day. Charlotte is a darling!!!!

You know, I might take you up on the offer to chat! None of my friends ever went through any PPD, so it kind of makes me feel like a freak. :)